I recently had a conversation with a man who believes that boys/men shouldn’t cry.
It was likely ingrained in him as a child.
We’ve all heard the expressions: “Boys who cry are sissies/weak/wimps. Boys DO NOT cry.”
Though this man says that’s what he believes for himself, he proclaims that he didn’t try to influence his boys of such things.
But did he?
Actions do, indeed, speak louder than words, which means he might not have spoken those words to his children, but he did model the behavior.
As I drove home, I thought about the lyrics, “Fathers be good to your daughters.”
Fathers be good to your sons, I thought.
Each one of us is born with the emotional facet. We are born to respond to external stimuli.
When we release our emotions, we share that energy with those around us.
When we bottle up our happy emotions, we deprive others of that happy vibe and ourselves of the added joy.
Have you ever, for whatever reason, withheld exciting news for a period of time.
“I thought I was going to bust a gut!” is a common expression.
When we bottle up sadness, the feelings expand like a noxious gas, eventually becoming toxic.
Those pent-up fumes tend to release in the form of anger.
Bitterness and resentment and sarcasm and a sense of insecurity often follow suit.
That is not being good to our boys, Journeyer.
Boys will do what you do.
Boys will become reactors who turn into fathers,
so mothers be good to your sons, too…
Men who are in touch with how they feel are able to be sympathetic to others.
Men who can express their emotions are more likely to have honest dialogue.
It’s also quite possible that in allowing our boys to be express how they feel and to release the negative energy from within that we can reduce domestic violence.
Fathers be good to your daughters,
Fathers be good to your sons, too,
Mothers be good to all your kiddos, too…
We need this, Journeyer; our boys need this…
Until we meet again, yours in hope, healing, and happiness,